When I was a child, I remember hearing people referring to others as “selfish” or “narcissistic.” When someone acts selfishly, they are acting in a way in which they can’t see beyond the Self, and they don’t realize the effect and hurt they cause people by their actions. True narcissism is a disease of the mind, and I personally don’t know if people can recover from that behavior. But the point I am trying to make is that these character traits are seen in those who do not feel self-love.
Self-love is apparent in people who are full enough that they enjoy sharing their love with others - they don’t feel drained by helping and loving someone else. But I don’t believe that we can fully operate in an energy of abundance and joy without loving our Selves first. The two go hand in hand.
Sometimes, self-love comes in the form of setting boundaries for your Self. It’s about living in a way that is comfortable to you and not accepting anything that comprises your integrity for the sake of someone else.
When we give our children boundaries, they are happy because they still have the freedom to play as long as they follow the “rules”. But as we become adults, we need to begin to advocate for our Selves and our inner child. We need to slow down and listen to our inner voice when we recognize that something we’re involved with may ultimately hurt us.
We all have inner guides operating within us. And when we slow down enough to listen, integrity will always align with the heart. One thing we all must realize though, is that you cannot make another do their inner work and you cannot do the inner work for them. We can offer support, listen to friends and give our advice, but ultimately, people must be willing to work on themselves.
Sometimes, we lose ourselves in unhealthy people and relationships. Self-love is when you can recognize this and remove yourself from these kinds of situations - knowing you are good enough to save your Self! When you feel as if you are not honoring your Self, you need to pull away, even if it feels good in the moment. Self-love is an act of living in your highest and treating your Self well when no one is watching.
We should all strive to never cheat or lie because we all know deep down we are only cheating ourselves. But we are humans, and we all make mistakes. The most important action to take when you hurt someone else non-intentionally is to be compassionate to your Self and be mature enough to take action and address the issue. Ask for forgiveness but also don’t forget to forgive your Self.
Another way we can practice self-love is by doing yoga, meditating, taking nature walks and contemplating. This is when I personally feel most in tune with my own body, mind and heart. I find self-love through teaching others and sharing with the people who take care of their Selves in the same way that I do.
Self-love is also being in tune with our own bodies well enough that we know when we need to rest or when we need to shut off the phone or when we need to speak to a friend and ask for help or when we simply need quiet time to regenerate.
Taking care of our bodies and minds is important. One practical way to practice self-love is with Ayurveda. After I received the Abyanga Ayurveda treatment, which involves warm oils rubbed into your skin by two practitioners at the same time, I knew other people should experience the same self-love that I felt from the treatment. That’s when I decided to launch my product line.
Now when I need to practice self-love, I often do the treatment at home. I use OSI Ayurveda Manifest Body Oil, which is made with sandalwood and rose oil. I warm it up a bit and put it all over my hair, feet, belly, shoulders and breasts. Then I take a bath to wipe off just enough but keep some of the oil on the body. I put quiet Kundalini music and get the best rest for the mind.
Valentine’s Day is always a good time of year to remember to practice self-love, but we should get in the habit of doing it daily. After reading this, I hope you love yourself each day moving forward, and do something sweet that will open your heart like a rose.
With love and gratitude,
Osi
]]>He continued on to assure me that it’s okay to procrastinate for a bit. I knew he was right, but I also knew that my inner voice would eventually make me look at the home within that I worked hard to build. In that moment, I made a promise to myself that I would eliminate 3 negative habits and add 3 positive habits.
To get back on track, I said I would stop drinking coffee and eliminate wheat and dairy from my diet. I promised myself that I would replace those eating habits with raw food, green juices and a weekly workout regimen.
But I also knew it would take effort to get back into my healthy routine. I recognized that I had not been pushing myself to focus on my health recently because it would feel like a restrain in addition to the one I was already battling - a 2-year divorce.
The divorce process took every inch of me and my body and made me feel like I was at war with myself. The last thing I wanted to do was wake up at 4 am and practice or eat raw food. I wanted nurturing, warm, cooked food, but I didn’t want to make it myself because I had no desire to be in my kitchen - a place where I shared love and laughter with my family that was now falling apart.
I had been so caught up in the external world and the court - focusing on abuse and unsettling issues - that I almost forgot my practice. For the past 20 years, my practice had supported me along the journey of ending a long and unhealthy relationship and finally moving forward. But I had eventually found myself putting more emphasis on morning coffee and extra hours of sleep instead of nurturing my home within.
Some kind, non-judgmental words from my dear friend, Anne Novak, truly helped me through this darker time. "Rest and when it’s time, you will get back on track." She kept reminding me not to stay in the victim space and that everything in my life was here to teach me something.
While I drove across the Tappan Zee Bridge with my son, I could hear my inner voice and Anne's words come to surface again. It told me that I am ready to take charge of my life again, wake up and be steady, and I agreed. If there's one thing I know about myself, it's that when I make a decision, I don't wait, I take charge!
And in that moment, I saw the beauty of the situation. My son was teaching me the lesson of love and nurture. That we are here on this Earth to circle our energy and stay grounded. It's important not to attach to material possessions or to our issues so much that we forget who we are. We must always put more energy into what we desire and what is aligned with our highest Self.
So now, I am on the beginning of my journey of returning to my healthy lifestyle. I am happy to be practicing my Abyanga belly oil massages in the morning again. And although I feel the strong withdrawals of coffee, I still feel more alive, clear and energetic.
Adversity is real, but it strips away everything, and whatever is left is the source of who we are. All that matters is that we are fully awake, aware, and ready to face the day, but from a place where we are connected to serving our lives and not as victims of this crazy world.
In closing, it feels good to be back and to regain control of my body and mind and to realize that what we put into our body directly affects our lives and everyone around us. We have a responsibility to better ourselves - for us first - but also for anyone we are lucky to call part of our lives.
With love and gratitude,
Osi
]]>Through all of these feelings, I realize how important it is to be grateful for the little things in life. During the holidays, even if you don't celebrate, you feel the excitement and tension in the air. There is so much power in simplicity, which is why I enjoy taking a holistic and uncomplicated approach in my holiday traditions.
This year, I will be cooking organic turkey for my kids, but I will also making vegan dishes that are healthy and easy to make. I stay committed to my yoga practice, since it has really provided me with the tools to take everything I learned on the mat and apply it to my life. I also enjoy a hike during the downtime of the cooking process. When I am done cooking, I take a bath with some sandalwood oil to ground my energy. I feel that if the host is chill, then everyone will have a good time.
During the holidays, we should talk about gratitude and try to keep an open heart, even if the week can provoke stress. We need to stay committed to ourselves while we engage with others. This time of year can be so exciting and so much fun, especially when we get to spend time with people we love and that we enjoy being with. Just remember to keep your inner smile and stay positive throughout the holiday season!
With love,
Osi
To learn more about Osi Mizrahi, please visit her website, Facebook and Twitter.
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This article was originally posted on Huffington Post. To read it there, please follow this link.
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I noticed that I no longer attract certain types of friends and coworkers as I used to. Presently, my friends are a lot more honoring and gentle. In the past, many of the people that surrounded me were judgmental and pushy, especially when it came to their philosophies and beliefs of right versus wrong.
I find that it is more powerful and honoring to recognize your inner truth and be grounded in your beliefs without pushing your ideas onto others in an overwhelming way. Real power is quiet and gentle, and real friends are honest and gentle with their approach.
Treat your self with kindness and love, and you will find that same kindness and love surrounding you. You will eventually notice the negative behavior occurring around you and choose to remove yourself from harmful relationships.
I have recently developed a new brand of products that remind me to be kind and loving towards my self on a daily basis. My Ayurveda Oils are made with so much love. I choose each ingredient with the intention of embracing femininity and the power that lies in it. I want women to embrace their power from womanhood, sensuality and femininity, not from power that is harsh or aggressive.
Love your self, be kind to your self and be your own best friend. The universe will conspire to love you too.
With Love,
Osi
To learn more about Osi Mizrahi, please visit her website, Facebook and Twitter.
For more by Osi Mizrahi, click here.
This article was originally posted on Huffington Post. To read it there, please follow this link.
]]>Throughout the ages, in societies like India and China, a teacher is always honored and included in the student's prayers and thoughts even after the classes are completed. Often, students would send money back to the teacher as a sign of affection and appreciation. When did we forget to take our shoes off for the sacred?
As the student embarks on the road of life, ready to embrace and apply the lessons learned, it is a constant challenge to preserve the essence of our study. How come we stray and lose the sacredness of who we really are? Today, we sue our doctors, we complain to the principal about our child's teacher, choosing to deflect and defer instead of listen and process. When did we become so self-indulged that we forget to be grateful and thankful to the people that educate us? We need to remember and honor those in public service. The teachers, the physicians, the healers are all dedicating their lives to help people better themselves, and yet, our society places more admiration on the CEO that makes seven figures.
As I pause and reflect upon my recently completed teacher training, I realize how wonderful it was to watch each student crawl, walk, and finally fly. The process helps each person to expand, empowering the individual who absorbs and ultimately embraces the philosophies to become a teacher with their own vision and expression. The process also feeds me. I make new friends, and I have an inner joy when I see many of the students I trained become successful teachers in their own right. The practice is challenging. At times, there are some who need more time or who are unable to complete the training. It is a difficult moment. But it is this honesty, above all else, which allows the student to grow and enables me to help those who need more time to move on.
Over the years, I have found my students to be grateful for the honest and direct feedback, as well appreciative of my desire and dedication towards expressions of excellence. But sometimes, an individual can get caught in an unfortunate spiral and disillusionment, losing their humility, grace, and forgetting the very essence of why they enrolled in the training to begin with. And with that, I know, the method is true.
Yoga is the perfect discipline to work through personal obstacles as a mindful human being. As modern Yoga evolved and became an established career, the student/teacher role still is rooted in the age-old ideals of the past. You must love the person enough to say NO so they can grow, just like you tell your child out of love that certain things are not acceptable. It is important to stand on the fundamental pillars of grace, sacred and divine. No pearl was ever made without a little irritation.
I remember my journey through the yoga world, and I can still feel the excitement of discovery. Each class touched my core. The seminars I attended as a young student were electric, with hundreds of people in the room at once. I had a thirst that was difficult to quench. I was mesmerized.
At first, we were individuals, and then we were family. I am forever grateful to my teacher, John Friend. His dedication, style, and passion motivated me to be more. Many of his disciples continue to be leaders in the yoga community to this day. I dedicated 10 years to studying yoga and meditation with John. He taught me to become the best I could be by breaking old habits, refining my practice and committing to many hours of hard work and studying. When I was around John, I felt like I knew him from a previous life. That feeling stays with me, despite all that happened. He had thousands of followers. Being part of such a strong network intensified my experience as a student; it felt more real. I met people from all over the world. Because of our shared experience, we knew each other on an extremely intimate level. We understood each other in a way that even our own families could not comprehend.
Working so closely within a community was good for me at that time in my life. I was able to lose myself. By losing myself, I was able to reclaim a better version of myself, which is all part of the growth process. It was a scary yet fantastic journey.
Our community thought that John was truly a wise man with deep knowledge about the path to happiness and integrity. Yes, even teachers, who become elevated because we empower them, can succumb to human frailty and temptation. With the absence of humility and grace, the masses can and do withdraw their empowerment. We all yearn for sincerity, and as a society, we flock to leaders who can inspire. Although individual choices and mistakes have mired John's image, I have forgiven him. I realized he was only a man on the same path as we all are. However his powerful and wonderful lessons and practices were, at their core, motivational, inspirational, and for me, transformational.
He changed my life and the lives of his other students, forever. I feel we should cherish those who change our lives, even if they do not live up to the expectations we created. Instead, we should offer blessings. That's when we really start to learn about love and the nature of the universe.
G-d understands that the good and bad are equally part of creation, that difficulties can become our greatest blessings or teachings.
I can use the lessons I learned in my yoga life experience, (steadfast commitment to working hard and playing hard while maintaining humility and grace), on any path that I choose to follow. Like the wonder a beautiful sunrise, the sound of chimes, and the smile of a child, these are the things in life we should not take for granted.
Love and Light,
Osi
To learn more about Osi Mizrahi, please visit her website, Facebook and Twitter.
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At the last yoga teacher training that I led, we did a practice in which one person spoke and the other listened; then, the listener had to repeat what they had just heard. What I wanted to achieve in this practice was to develop a good sense of knowing how to “read between the lines.” It’s like when you read the Bhagavad Gita for the first time. Initially, the text reads like the tale of a war or battle. But, as you go deeper into the story, you realize that it might also represent an internal conflict, such as the search for G-d, the need for liberation and self-realization.
Behind the words is where the heart lies. That’s where you get to connect to another human being on a whole different level. For me, that is how my well gets filled — by really seeing people and learning about them. The way to really see and learn about people is by learning how to listen, and seeing and learning about people is a key to finding real meaning behind this life.
When you start to listen, you begin to hear not only the words, but also the texture of the words and the breath behind the words — the emotion and the story that is waiting to unfold. My new practice is to start answering directly to what I hear “behind the words” instead of what another person is saying on the surface. I don’t have to go far to do this practice. I can start right at home with my three boys. The other day, before getting mad at my son for something he’d said — which is my instinct to do — I paused and took a deep breath. I asked myself, What is really going on here? I stated to my son what I really saw going on, and then I asked him if I was correct. My son’s frown completely melted into a smile. The moment became one in which we were able to connect “behind the words” and “between the lines.”
It is in moments like this that we start to really live; they are what stay with us and connect us. Instead of a tangled kind of conversation, or one that is manipulative, we should learn to converse in a soft, loving way. This practice will help us attain a richer and more spacious life, a life of wisdom that will awaken our souls. I realized that, if I can become sensitive and attentive in real life, then I can also learn to listen on stage; the skills are not so different from one another.
I really believe that that is where G-d resides, not in the place where you go to pray, but at home. G-d resides in the giving of your attentive, precious time to another person. When we listen as if we are completely there for the other person, we connect with the ongoing pulsation of the universe.
The art of listening to others is similar to reading and beginning to understand the Scriptures. The more you study the Scriptures, the more you can dive into the meaning of them. The stories that were told have layers of meaning. How deeply we can dive into them depends on the teacher and the readiness of the student. The way to become a good listener is by not taking anything too personally. Being detached helps you really hear the other person, not your self or your projections. It’s like my friend said to me, “I was in the same place 10 years ago, but I didn’t hear a word this teacher said. Now I am ready to hear.”
This is the art of listening, welcome home.
Peace and Love,
Osi
“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
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For me, this time isn’t just an experience of clarity. I’ve also experienced feeling lost and as if my heart is about to break. It is a very intense experience.
Usually when the heart feels pain and suffering we have a tendency go to our cell phones, computers, televisions. We will do practically anything but “sit with” or simply “be with” the pain. But for me, there has been no where and way to run. I needed to sit with the feelings and there were no thoughts to occupy my mind except the actual feelings that were arising. So I surrendered to what was there and prayed. I stayed with the feelings long enough that the pain turned and awakened my heart open and more clarity poured into my heart. It’s like I was awakened to the truth of my heart. This is now my favorite time of morning, and I know that I have no idea when being awakened like this is going to happen again. My yoga teacher refers to it as “Shakti awakening you in the middle of the night.”
I spend many days in meditation for this purpose: to quiet the mind enough so that I can have the deepest access to my heart’s language. We tend to make ourselves so busy doing everything we can possibly do to avoid a broken heart. But the breaking open is when the heart begins to speak to us most deeply. At that time of the night, there is something magical happening. A deep transmission.
Yogi Bhajan recommended waking up at Vatta time, from 3 a.m. — 5 a.m. (anytime before 6 a.m.). He recommended that you shower and rinse with cold water for a few seconds to wake up, then sit on your bed or in your sacred space, your meditation space (if you have one).
I find Snatam Kaur Ong Namo opens my heart and allows me to be softer to receive whatever may be there to receive. Sometimes, I even find that chanting with the music releases pain inside my heart. Then I do a few stretches and pranayama. I do three to 11 minutes of breath of fire, also called Kapalabati (you can see my instructions for this in my video on osiliving.com or osiyoga.com), and then I sit and I see what arises. Most importantly, I stay in and with the feelings, rather than in the thoughts.
I promise you that the more you practice this way, the more you will build trust in yourself and a relationship with the deepest language of your heart and relationship with your own soul.
“Your mind is your servant, your body is your vehicle and your soul is your residence.” — Yogi Bhajan
With Love,
Osi
To learn more about Osi Mizrahi, please visit her website, Facebook, and Twitter.
For more by Osi Mizrahi, click here.
This article was originally posted on Huffington Post. To read it there, please follow this link.
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